pregorexia...

For about the last week I have been stewing about something that my FNP said to me on my first prenatal visit. She said, "just so you know, you only have about 5 or 10 pounds left to gain with this pregnancy so you should probably start exercising or something." I was stunned! As I sat there in disbelief I thought to myself, "what the crap does she know?". Apparently on the bullshiz BMI chart I am in the overweight category- barely. I lost a ton of weight this year, I was down to 155 just one month ago when I found out I was carrying my 2nd little bundle of joy. I have not done anything differently, I have exercised and eaten well, I am just getting a little bit fluffier is all. I told my friend about this bad experience and she sent me an email about "pregorexia". Go ahead and google it my friends, it is real. The definition is something like caring too much about your weight and physical image more than your growing fetus to the level that you actually cause your child malnutrition and low birth weight. Clearly this is a mental thing that carries over to a physical problem. Now I am not professing to be a skinny little prego girl but I certainly dont think of myself as a fatty patty either. I care about my child getting nourishment and therefore I eat 6 small meals a day and drink TONS of water. If that causes me to be in the overweight category then so be it, I would rather have a healthy child and lose the weight later, which I know I can do because I have done it. I took a sideview pic of myself today so that you could all see my "overweight" and hot bod! LMK what you think about my FNP's comment!

bad reflexes

Hello everyone,
I have to tell a quick and somewhat funny story of my life since finding out I am pregnant. Last week I ran into the post at work twice. Not once but TWICE. Yes, I was in my new car and did some damage to the back passenger wheel well. I do not know what my deal is, I blame bad reflexes due to pregnancy. Also, I have noticed lately that drivers are a bit more edgy than usual. Maybe its my black tinted windows or my ability to sneak into small crevices, but people seem to be getting really mad at me lately when I am driving. This morning I was trying to get off of the 4th south exit which requires a rather quick lane change and a lot of ground to cover in a small amount of time. I saw an opening and I sped up to take it. The biotch in the car in front of me slammed on her brakes, apparently in an attempt to not let me over. I am not even sure why she did this because she got in the other lane and didnt even take the exit. When we were even with one another (she slowed down significantly to be able to be next to me) she flailed her arms all over and yelled directly at me. I dont want to know what she said but it really caught me off guard and I cant figure out why she is all of the sudden a traffic nazi. I am only bothered by this because I could have run into the back of her causing a major pile up thanks to her idiotic driving - my reflexes suck and I have a 2 year old in the car. Just because my windows are tinted does not mean that I am a single, non pregnant person with no kids in the car. It just means that my child is extremely white and absolutely hates the sun to hit her at all - thus my investment in tinting. I guess that the reason for this post is for me to vent a little bit and remind everyone that we should all drive defensively - we never know if there are kids in the car. I dont know about you, but I dont want to be responsible for a child dying because I decide to be a jerk driver one day.

life and death in the larsen family

Hello everyone, thought I would update you all on the above title of this blog entry. Gary and I found out last week that we will be welcoming our second child into this world around April 1, 2009! We were so stoked about this news and have been waiting for this for months. Yes, it was totally planned and we are so excited! In the event that we have a boy this will more than likely be the conclusion of the Gary/Jackie clan. In the event that we have a girl there is a possibility that we may try one more time for a boy in a few years. Last Thursday we received a phone call letting us know that Gary's grandpa Hadley had passed away. This news was bittersweet as we all knew how badly he wanted to be with his wife that passed away in a car crash in 1996. Grandpa Hadley blessed all of our lives and we will miss him but we know that he is finally happy and free from the cares of this world. The funeral was a good reminder to me of how to treat our spouses and children. It is of the utmost importance that we let our families know how much we love and value them in our time with them on this earth. We do not know when we will be called back to heaven so we must make the most of everyday we are given. I like to think of death as a gorgeous sunset. The sun will set on our lives but it is a beautiful thing and no one sunset is the same. Although the sun will set on our lives, the sun will rise in our children's lives - watch the Lion King, it does a great analogy of this. Thanks to all friends and family and for all the support and prayers, we love you all and hope to see you next spring when we welcome little Tate/Tatum into our lives!

THE BIG GIRL BED!!

The shelb has graduated from her crib to the big girl bed!! Yay for Shelby!!

bonk!

LAST THRUSDAY WE TOOK A LITTLE TRIP TO THE DINOSAUR PARK IN OGDEN. WE WALKED AROUND, BOUGHT A 30 FREAKIN DOLLAR DINOSAUR, MET SOME MASSIVE AND MEAN LOOKING DINOSAURS AND ATE DINO DOGS. WE DECIDED TO WRAP UP THE EXPERIENCE BY GOING TO THE DINO PLAYGROUND. SHELBY HAD TONS OF FUN GOING UP AND DOWN THE SLIDES AND CLIMBING ON ALL THE DINOSAURS. WE WERE SITTING WATCHING SHELB GO DOWN THE STEPS OF THE PLAYGROUND AND ALL OF THE SUDDEN SHE JUST FACE PLANTED ON THE STEPS. SHE SCREAMED LIKE I HAVE NEVER HEARD BEFORE! HER HEAD HAS FINALLY BECOME THAT GREENY PURPLE COLOR AND I'VE BEEN GETTING SOME LOOKS FROM PEOPLE. TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION - I DO NOT BEAT MY CHILD ;) IF ANYTHING, SHE BEATS ON ME...AND GARY...AND PROBABLY SOME OF THE KIDS AT SCHOOL.

My shelb

summer, sweet summer

sunset at the pond

Shelby, Lyndee and I visited the duck pond last night. We got attacked by 2 rather large families of geese wanting our bread. Shelby was so daring, she walked right up to the edge of the pond to get closer to the ducks and geese. I love to spend time with her, even if it means that she stays up late ;) She's so much fun to be with, I feel like the luckiest mom in the world to have her.

Happy Father's Day!

Yesterday at school Shelby learned about daddy's and things that they do. She learned about face shaving (which is actually something she has never seen Gary do since he has had a beard since she was born). When we got home last night she decided to try out her new skill in the tub. Dont worry, there is no blade in the razor (I know there are people freaking out)! She did a pretty spiffy job I must say! Happy father's day daddy, we love you!

SHELBY WAN KENOBI

Ok, the latest and greatest blog update is now here. Shelby is obsessed with her orange towel and really anything orange in general. She will not take it off after she gets out of the tub or shower and walks around looking like ObiWan Kenobi. I think she is doing little Jedi mind tricks on me, actually I know she is...sneaky little thing. Also, whenever she is in the vicinity of a camera lately she does this huge cheese face like you can see in the pic. Its freakin funny! Oh, and speaking of the orange obsession that we have going on, I found an orange matchbox car in her bed (crib) the other morning - she was laying on top of it. How she got it in there without me knowing it is beyond my comprehension, its those jedi mind tricks I tell ya. Anyway, work sucks as usual, I have been in trainings this week that have almost bored me to death. Gary injured his back and so has been in lots of pain and not very fun to be around. Its affecting his work also, so that sucks. At least I know that at 5pm every day Shelby will be stoked to see me, I look forward to that ;)

Ugh work.

Thursday, boring Thursday. I am sitting in my office being totally bored even though I have TONS of work that needs to be done. I was off yesterday (took a mental health day) and so now I am just not in the working mood. I had to blur the pic of my office a little for confidentiality reasons. I look a little pissy but thats just my normal look ;) I'm so glad tomorry is Friday, I'm sick of being at work this week.

Current Pics!!!!!

Shelby was completely enthralled with the Blues Clues movie she was watching on the long drive home from SLC. Dont worry, she snapped out of it and we played in her pool when we got home! Just want everyone to know that i have lost 35 pounds since Shelby was born!! Woot woot!! I'm very proud of myself, I go to the gym 2-3 times a week!! If you are wondering why there are no pictures of Gary on here recently that is because he is a butt and wont let me take his picture - like are we in junior high or what?? ;)

Memorial Day Tribute to Daddy

Memorial Day has historically been a bad day for me. This year was a little different because my family has changed so much. My little Shelby is now over 2 and her big blue eyes remind me of him everyday. She carries his picture around the house and seems to know what I am talking about when I say his name. Its amazing how close children are to the spirit world. We visited the cemetary like we do every year and took pictures, they will be posted as soon as I pull them off my camera. This year Memorial Day brought a new perspective to my life. I realized that I needed to step back and look at "the big picture", meaning that I needed to think of every day as if it were my last. The song that best describes how I felt is Tim McGraw's "Live like you were dying". I also heard Reba's "The greatest man I never knew" and this brought me to tears thinking of how my dad worked up until the day he died. Oh how I wish I could have one more day on this earth with him, but since that is not possible I have started to make an effort to mend my relationships so that in the event that I leave early, things will be in order. Once someone you dearly love in your life dies you gain a new perspective as to what is most important in life, it has taken me 10 years and I continue to learn every day. My anger at him for leaving has changed to a feeling of happiness that he does not have to be a part of this evil world that continues to get worse and worse. I read a scripture the other day that stated something to the effect that the spirits of the spirit world are around us, they feel our pain, they feel our sadness and see our mistakes and they wait and hope for us to be happy. I know this is true, I have felt my dad although I have never seen him as a spirit. Knowing that he is with me, along with others I have lost along the way, brings peace to me. Give those you love a hug and tell them how much they mean to you, they may be gone tomorrow and you will have lost your chance in this life. - Jackie

OH MY CRAP! ITS BEEN 2 YEARS!

Well it appears that i have not posted to my freaking awesome and terribly popular blog for 2 years now. Kids can make time fly by, seriously. I'm just going to post a quick update for those that i havent seen in awhile. Shelby turned 2 in March, we remodeled our house, gary got his long awaited 65 inch flatscreen, i got a new car, we are planning to get pregnant this summer with child #2 - which will be the last of the Jackie/Gary clan. We already have the name whether its a boy or girl - Tate! I still work for SSA doing disability claims, Gary still works for Greene's Inc cutting concrete and Shelby still goes to the fabulous YWCA Lollie Eccles daycare where she is now learning chemistry 2010 and pre med courses. We are very happy in our own little Larsen world. We dont leave the house much, mainly for groceries or I take shelby to the duck pond for a bike ride. We love our life, no complaints at this time! More posts to come...

babies change people, its true

A baby can change a lot of things in life. Its funny how people that you have never talked to or dont even know suddenly want to see your baby and ask like 500 questions about them. Babies also bring families closer. Whenever we go to a family activity lately we are the most popular people there because everybody wants to see and hold shelby. Even family members that i wasnt on good terms with or havent talked to in years suddenly forget the past and become my friend again. As an example, just the other day i was at training table for lunch with gary and shelby. I had to take her to the bathroom to change her pants and she was fussing. I walked past the cashier counter and like 5 employees rushed out to see shelby and ask me how old she is and blah blah blah. I have to admit that while i was pregnant i was overly interested in babies. Once i was in the bathroom at Rainbow Gardens and a girl was changing her newborn baby. I wanted to see it so bad that i walked right into a wall while staring. Then i tried to exit through the closet, i was embarrassed to say the least. So i can see why people are so interested. Babies dont stay small for long and you dont really see lots of babies out and about every day. I must admit that Shelby is especially popular because she is SO STINKIN CUTE and everybody wants to see and touch her thick hair. Not only has Shelby changed me, she causes even the most tired and pissed off cashier at Walmart to smile and comment about how cute she is, instantly changing their demeanor. I dont know what it is about babies that makes people suddenly nice, its a strange phenomenon. All i know is that i like it =)

Deep thoughts of Shelby

Today I had a rough day. I am just bummed about going back to work. Im not bummed because i dont want to work, Im bummed because i will miss shelby all day long. I actually enjoy my job and my friends at work very much, but i also enjoy my shelb too. In all honesty, i have to work. Not much of a choice, this is the life that I have chosen and I love working and using my college education for something. I will be with shelb every week on Friday, Saturday and Sunday and also every night after work. I dont feel guilty about having to put her in daycare, i feel that it will be a good social experience for her. I recenly went and checked out the daycare that shelb will be going to. Its right down the street from my house and the lady that runs it is SUPER nice and very good with babies. I felt very good about it when i went to visit. SO my question is this: why do people feel the need to express thier very strong opinions about child care to me when clearly i have a different opinion? I dont try and force my opinion on them, nor would i ever make someone feel like a bad parent for having to go to work to provide for thier children. What about single parents? Are they bad parents because they have to put thier kids in daycare? I think not. I just wish that people would keep thier rude opinions to themselves and do the most sensitive thing - put themselves in my shoes. Yes, I love shelby more than anything. Yes, I value our time together. Yes, I want her to have a good and meaningful life. Yes, I want her to have a good relationship with me and her family. No, I dont think that putting Shelby in daycare is "letting someone else raise my child". Shelby will grow up to love me as her mother because that is exactly what I am, I care about her more than anything and being a working mom just means that the time I get to spend with her will mean everything to me and i will make it the best i possibly can.

proud uncle!

proud grandma!

The whole Fam Damly!